I don't know about you but I do feel ignored and under-served from time to time and I wondered if there was something wrong with me. Am I not sharp and eccentric enough to catch people's attention? Am I ageing so quickly that no-body gives a shit to this woman of a certain age anymore? And on a serious note, if I am to remain invisible, I won't be hired or valued in this society when youth and green are much sought after. It hurts when others behave in a way that makes me feel that I have nothing worthwhile to contribute to civilisation, completely blinded to my personality and abilities. I am not expecting catcalls and whistles but invisibility cloaks my ability to be validated in meaningful ways. The yardstick used to measure a woman's value is so vain and superficial!
Ageism is a problem on a global scale. Why on earth was the word coined in the first place otherwise? But no one should be denied a job or opportunities due to our age when we have so much wisdom and life experiences to offer and bring to the table after treading the earth for 50+ years. No beauty products out there would deliver the promise of turning us back to our 20's because it is all about our attitude and consciousness.
I am pretty selective when it comes to befriending women in particular and I must admit I admire those who take a stance and choose for themselves. Knowing that we are enough just as we are. As a solopreneur myself, I bow to those who thrive on their own terms, comfortable with fluidity and their ever evolving natures. These are the women who can't be invisible but stand out in the crowd shining with pride and celebrating success.
There is no such thing as age-appropriateness or agelessness. Trained as a personal stylist, I know exactly what suits and what not and I hardly spend much time coordinating my outfit before heading out the door. I am relaxed and happy about my imperfections and limitations in the reflection of the mirror. I give myself the permission to age on my own terms. I am fully aware of the fact that I ain't no spring chicken anymore but relish a more mature me. I wear what I love and constantly seeking to try something new. Quality is what I look for these days (as opposed to quantity). Right now I am proactively looking for work or what am I sticking around for? I can only binge watch CSI for so long but I definitely need a purpose to make my days meaningful. I find myself travelling the uncharted territory more often, focusing on the journey while being content with mediocrity. So what if I am a dabber / scanner? I don't have to be a master in everything I do!
I do believe I have the power to shape some part of my reality. Every time I learn something new or develop a new habit I bend reality. I shape the world around myself to my own liking. My current circumstances are less than ideal but every body has problems and I learn to deal with my failures and fuck-ups, knowing that this too shall pass.
If you have known me for quite some time, I have no appetite to fight my ageing self. On the other hand, I wear my birth date on my skin for everyone to see. My age is not a secret and I know deep down I have earned my less than perfect face and body. There are more medical problems one can handle but this is what machines do. They don't run like new and body parts / organs rust with time.
So what is there to relish being a woman at 50?
My vulnerability and ignorance
Spontaneity
Resilience
Bright and articulate
A writer whose words inspire and encourage
A prolific creator
Honesty and transparency
Authenticity
Comfortable in my own skin
Highly organised
A natural born teacher / leader
Fearless to changes
Courageous
Adventurous
My imperfect beauty
Speaking my mind and standing up to my beliefs
Creativity
Resourceful
A fierce warrior
And what are yours?
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